Awkward morning

The other day my little brother had his first ‘sleep-over’ with a lady friend, at the latter’s house. Now I am not one to have formed any ideas of what may occur,

but he was adamant that nothing would happen.

Regardless, he invited the young lass back to our house come the next morning. At this point I started to believe him: mostly because they arrived early in the morning and I was still asleep.

Now, there is something you must know about me: I revel in awkwardness. So long as I am aware that the situation is awkward, I can switch my brain to think ‘this is kinda fun, AND will make a good story later’. This gives me the ability, however false it may be, to believe I am above the cringe-worthy moment and somehow its puppeteer. I control the awkward and the awkward will listen. So I revel.

Back to my bro, even though he said nothing would happen, and I’d started to believe him, I still wanted to make sure that his lady friend knew that she had picked the wrong brother. You must excuse this extremely arrogant train of thought. I had just woken and was until recently the hero of some epic battle and full of pride (note, I have never, and probably will never be able to draw animals) and, if you were ever to meet my lil’ bro, you would realise these stick figures are giving him a couple more kilos than he is due.

To achieve this, I timed the exit from my room such that I would meet the young lass. Naked. Except for my under wear. Thinking to impress. And, of course, also to cause a little bit of awkward, sexual tension.

However, my plan was flawed, given I had just woken up…

My somewhat distorted morning memory tells me that the lady was rather attractive. But a more likely scenario was this.

So who was the real winner?